Some fashion faux-pas know no bounds, they can’t be tethered to any particular time of year. Take Cuban heels for men, a la Simon Cowell, for example. Others, however, are specific to a particular season – we give you the festive fashion faux-pas.

As ’tis the season of goodwill, we have helpfully listed below the top sartorial errors of judgement best avoided if you don’t want to end up eating Christmas dinner for one, or be the talk of the office the morning after the work Christmas party.

1. Red and green should never be seen

There is a reason this saying has stuck. Wear red and green together at Christmas time and all anyone will be able to see is Will Ferrell in Elf. At any other time of year, you have a far better chance of getting away with it, simply by claiming all the street style bloggers are doing it these days (something we do a lot by the way).

2. There is such a thing as too much sparkle

You might think now is the time to fully indulge your love of glitter, with shops full of sequinned dresses, shimmering clutches and sparkly cardigans. But put it all together and you’ll resemble a giant walking bauble. Save the tinsel for the tree.

3. Slinging your tatty old coat over your party outfit

We all do this. You spend weeks agonising over what to wear to your Christmas shindig and then you fling on any old moth-eaten coat over the top and drag along your bulging work bag, full of scrunched up tissues and biro ends. Even if you are going to dump it in the cloakroom, it doesn’t have to be this way. Topshop is coming down with boleros and clutches after all.

4. Comedy Christmas clothing and accessories

It doesn’t make you seem fun and crazy; it makes your colleagues want to de-friend you – in real life, not just on Facebook. However ironic you think they are, Christmas tree earrings, reindeer antlers, Christmas cracker hats and Christmas jumpers outside of Christmas Jumper Day (Friday, December 13) all fall into this category.

5. Party heels you can’t dance in

I have to hold my hand up to this one. Some shoes are only made for sitting in, or for the short journey from taxi to red carpet. For some reason, I always forget this while planning my Christmas party outfits and opt for the most fabulous and most vertiginous heels I can find. Cut to eight hours later, at 3am, when I’m carrying my designer shoes and negotiating the tube in bare feet. Save everyone the pain of you bleating on about it for hours and go for a block heel or even some Alexa Chung inspired flats.

6. Mixing casual and formal

The guys are most guilty of this one. For the office Christmas party, the average woman will give herself a mani-pedi, remove every inch of body hair she can find, get a blow dry and spend hours perfecting a smokey eye that doesn’t make her look like she’s got a shiner. Men will swap their suit trousers for jeans and untuck their work shirt. Worse still, the poor misguided souls will often choose to pair their ensemble with some shiny dress shoes. Like Red Bull and milk (don’t try it), casual and formal shouldn’t mix.

7. Dressing with no regard for the arctic conditions

It is fact that only Geordies are able to survive the cold British winters wearing next to nothing. The rest of us need more layers so please wear tights or a jumper if you’re heading out during the festive period.

8. Bandage/barely there dresses

Just don’t. The bandage dress is a fashion faux-pas banker for anyone with even the merest hint of any lumps or bumps, but particularly at Christmas when we’re eating our own body weight in poultry and spuds. The new trend for WBD (‘why bother dresses’), which tend to be 90% sheer, should also be avoided, especially at the office Christmas party.

9. Ignoring the dress code

As Debrett’s Guide to British Behaviour tells us, ‘Dress codes are strictly observed in Britain – failure to comply would be considered rude or, at worse, you would be refused entry to the event’. So, if you’re lucky enough to be invited to a bad taste fancy dress party over the festive period, you can ignore all the above, wrap fairy lights round your head, tinsel round your neck and hit the Advocaat.